Kissing Ram Dass
Present Sense № 9
Welcome to Present Sense – a weekend curation for Paid Subscribers – with 7 sensory recommendations: something to SEE, HEAR, SMELL, TASTE, TOUCH, BALANCE and ENVISION. Each week also includes an audio guided meditation.
If you rather listen, play the audio reading below.
I knew nothing of Ram Dass until I moved to California, ten years ago. I noticed his seminal book ‘Be Here Now’ sitting on a corner table, at a friend’s party. The blue cover intrigued me, and I became fully absorbed in it for the next hour, until someone came and fetched me. “What’s this?” I asked. “Oh that’s Ram Dass! You don’t know about him?!” Indeed, I did not. But the seed was planted and continued to grow, until eventually it sprouted into a kiss.
For those like me, unfamiliar with Ram Dass: he was a psychedelic pioneer and one of the most influential American spiritual teachers of Eastern philosophy. Born in Boston as Richard Alpert in 1931, he became a prominent psychologist at Harvard University. There, he met Dr. Timothy Leary with whom he embarked on a revolutionary study and experimentation of the therapeutic effects of psychedelics – setting off a cultural movement.
Following his expulsion from Harvard, Richard Alpert set off to India for the first time in 1967. There, he met Neem Karoli Baba, affectionately known as Maharaj-ji, who would become his guru. Richard Alpert was given the Indian name Ram Dass, which translates to “servant of God.” He returned to the US to share what he had learned, introducing millions of Americans to Eastern philosophies, meditation, and Buddhist teachings.
Though the book ‘Be Here Now’ initially piqued my curiosity, it wasn’t until years later that I really connected with Ram Dass’ teachings. Fittingly, it was following a transformative psychedelic therapy, when suddenly his teachings started to deeply resonate with me. I would watch his videos and my whole body would hum with affirmation. His words were no longer just intellectual concepts, but felt like resounding truths.
In December 2019, I flew to Maui for a friend’s wedding. My partner couldn’t join the trip, but I had decided to extend my stay to enjoy a little solo vacation. I boarded the plane with the intention of saying “yes” to all possibilities that week. That meant agreeing to sharing a room with a stranger from the wedding party – which turned into a deep and on-going friendship. It also meant saying “yes” when I received a spontaneous invite to spend a day at the Ram Dass retreat.
Some of the spiritual big names would be there: people whose books I’ve read, and meditation teachers who have influenced my path. I arrived in the morning and was delighted to hear Mirabai Bush speak, to meet Jack Kornfield, and to watch Krishna Das chant.
And then, Ram Dass appeared. Though the retreat is centered around his teachings, it was unclear whether he would be there. He was scheduled to make a guest appearance at the Kirtan concert the previous evening, which he was unable to, due to his health. So it came as a surprise to everyone that he managed to show up.
He arrived on stage to a joyous applause. The musicians were chanting their ritual prayers, as Ram Dass swayed side to side on his wheelchair. When the music came to an end, I spotted the friend who had invited me. As her and I were chatting, Ram Dass was wheeled down the side stage ramp. His gaze caught mine and his face opened into the widest and most welcoming smile. I felt a nudge pushing me forward, and my legs automatically started moving towards him, as if pulled by a magnetic force.
Before I could realize what was happening, I was a few feet away from Ram Dass. He stretched his arm to grab my hand, and slowly brought it to his lips to kiss it. In an instinctual response, I did the same. With the same slow-motion speed, I leaned down and held his fragile and wrinkled hand close to my face, and kissed it. “Nice to meet you,” I said, looking into his bright blue eyes. His smile widened even further, “Nice… to… meet… you… too,” he responded.
The interaction was brief, probably no longer than a few seconds, but in that moment, time stretched into infinity. I’m typically skeptical of gurus and people who place these teachers on a pedestal. I always assumed that if I met one of them, they wouldn’t have any special effect on me. They’re just human, after all. But Ram Dass offers another way of thinking of gurus: “A guru is your gateway to God, an entrance, and a pure mirror… he isn't anybody at all.”
In that simple exchange with Ram Dass, I felt fully seen, utterly accepted and deeply loved. It was the first time we were meeting, yet it’s as if he had seen an old friend. There was a sense of recognition and a true joy at being reunited with someone you love. For the rest of the day, and my week in Maui, I was floating on cloud nine. I flew back home with a sense of awe, wonder, and expansive love.
Two weeks later, Ram Dass died on December 22, 2019.
His legacy will live on, in the form of talks, books, and films, which I imagine will influence many generations of seekers. I’ll continue to find solace in this trail of wisdom he left behind. Yet when I think of him, what will stay with me more than anything else, is that fleeting moment we shared.
It reminds me of the famous Maya Angelou saying: “I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
I can often confuse my intellectual accomplishments as my roadmap to positive impact. And I can feel deflated that my creative efforts are minuscule in the face of the world’s gloom. But then I summon up that moment with Ram Dass – a reminder that the most positive impact can come in the form of a loving gaze, and a smile.
For today’s sensory recommendations, I’m offering you 7 ways to experience Ram Dass’ wisdom through your senses: SEE, HEAR, SMELL, TASTE, TOUCH, BALANCE and ENVISION.
In Joy,
Sabrina
PS: Next week, instead of Present Sense, I’ll be publishing my Seasonal Travel Guide for paid subscribers. Every Solstice and Equinox, I explore a new destination with (or as) a local. Past guides include Paris and Mexico City.
